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[29 Jul 2009|10:15am]
I'm thinking about deleting this thing. I'm not in college/ high school anymore. And now that there are facebook status updates and twitters to do livejournal seems obsolete.
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who uses livejournal anymore? [08 Apr 2009|09:08pm]
I have about four months left of my AmeriCorps term. I can't wait for it to be over, but I'm also a little worried about what I'm going to do next. It would be really nice to find a decently paying job, but I haven't had good luck with that in the past. I'd like not to be unemployed again. I thought about applying for a teaching fellowship in Boston, but the pay is only $16,000/yr and we'd have to move to Boston. I just don't know what else to do. I'm kind of over western Mass.
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I don't update this thing ever [12 Dec 2008|01:37pm]
I'm home from work today because of the ice storm. It looks like things are melting outside, so I might head to the Hadley store in a bit to get some more Christmas gifts and get some wrapping done by the Step participants another AmeriCorps member is working with (if you need any gift wrapped go to Barnes & Noble in Hadley between 3 and 9 today, donations go to the Step Holiday Fund. It's a good cause, I promise).

I feel like I've been really busy lately. I work a lot, and drive a lot, and don't have a lot of time to get things done at home. I just cleaned the kitchen/living room. This weekend I was invited to two parties Saturday (we're going to Desmond & Michelle's because we haven't seen them in forever), and my sister is home Saturday so I think Sunday we're going to my mom's. Then next weekend is the family Christmas party, then it's frickin' Christmas, then New Years, then back to normal? I'm not going to be taking much time off around the coming holidays I don't think. Just Christmas day and New Year's day. But I need the hours, so it's ok.

I've been thinking about what's going to come next for me, after AmeriCorps. And I have absolutely no idea. I'm either going to have to find a job or go back to school. Both of those things are easier said than done. We need to get out of Western Mass though. For sure.
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i never update [28 Oct 2008|09:03pm]
I'm working in Orange. I like it so far, but I hate the commute. The girl I've been tutoring got an 80 on her last test, which was pretty cool. She was excited about it, and it felt good to have helped. I'm going to be working with her a lot. She's an interesting kid. I like doing the drop-ins at the library. Thursday we're having a half-assed Halloween party which will be fun (hopefully).

I've been invited to two parties this weekend, neither of which I'm sure I want to go to. They're both work-people parties, which I don't know how I feel about.

I suck at livejournal.
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[06 Oct 2008|12:25pm]
We climbed Tully Mt. with Nate's family yesterday. It was a really awesome time. The first time we've done that in a while, and the first time with my new leg and non-smoking. It was still tough, but definitely better than before. Going down was rough, though, because my leg isn't really set for steep declines. I don't want to go down a mountain at the same speed I go down stairs. I had to lean on Nate, but then I changed to a big stick. I think I pulled something in my arm because of it.

I'm giving my notice at Target today. I accepted the AmeriCorps job, and I'm going to my first meeting on Wednesday, then training on Thursday and Friday. There are two programs I could join, one is in Greenfield and one is in Orange (i know, right?). I'm a little worried about getting put in the Orange one mainly because it's fucking far away, and also because it's Orange. So, we'll see.

The apartment is gross, and I need to clean it.
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[02 Oct 2008|03:05pm]
Americorps offered me a position. I have to get back to them by Monday. I'm pretty sure I'm going to say yes. I want to give my notice at Target like right now. I can't take much more of it there. So ridiculously awful. But I'm going to probably need a second job, so depending on my hours with Americorps, I feel like I should keep Target there as an option. But I also really want to give my notice so I can start being an asshole to people and really slacking off (more than I have been lately). I'm not sure what to do. It would be cooler if I was being offered a well-paying job, but this is the only time in my life when I'll be able to do something like this. I'd rather work helping people and be broke than work doing something utterly meaningless and be slightly less broke.
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[23 Sep 2008|09:34pm]
Nate is sick, and I want him to stop.
I saw Jonathaan Safran Foer speak at UMass tonight, and it was really cool to see an author I like in person and hear about how he writes books. A lot of people asked some silly/obvious questions, some were just weird, he didn't really directly answer many, which I liked. His attitude was pretty much that he wrote some books and people will read them and interpret them and he doesn't have much to input after that. Which is cool. I guess. Maybe that's why I like books so much, especially ones that make me feel things. You can't really read a book wrong, and it doesn't really matter (at least not entirely) what the author meant, because he might not have really known what he meant until the book was finished, and what he thinks the book means might not necessarily be what every reader takes away from it. I don't know if I know what I'm talking about. Maybe I should start writing and apply to grad school.
I keep saying that I need to do something- that I need change- but I keep not doing anything.
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americorps. [17 Sep 2008|11:33pm]
So, working at Target fucking sucks and everyday my hopes of doing something meaningful die a little. I can't find a job at a school, or even at a better store. My phonecalls and emails to potential employers go unanswered. I'm starting to accept that fact that I work at Target and consider what it would be like to move up in the ranks, wich is fucking terrifying. I KNOW I can do better, so why aren't I?

I saw a listing for Americorps YouthServe program, which puts people in different situations working with at-risk youth in Franklin County. The thing is, you don't make any significant income doing this, but you do get FREE health care and cool training and money to pay off student loans. I figure, since I can't find a real job, if I'm going to be barely scraping by I might as well be doing something that matters. The job is <url="http://www.dialself.org/americorps/">here</url>. I need to give them thre qualities that would make me an effective member, as well as a history of my exprience working with youth. I'm going to apply tomorrow. What three qualities should I use?
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[28 Aug 2008|12:59pm]
I am now licensed to teach English to 8-12 graders. Now I just need to find a job. I mailed my stuff to Springfield yesterday. I called their human resources office today and the guy who answered wasn't very helpful, but he gave me another number for the person who hires people for the schools. I emailed her, but I should also call. I figure my chances of getting a job with no real teaching experience are better in a place like Springfield where it's hard to find good teachers. It's official now, though. Pretty exciting. I'll celebrate by working at Target until 8 tonight, tomorrow night, and the next night. Then next week I'll work there everyday from 1:30-10. I better get a new job soon or I'm gonna hurt somebody.
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[26 Aug 2008|02:45pm]
I can't even get a job as a paraprofessional/ esp. This is starting to get really depressing. If Ellerie wasn't here I'd be crying. I've been trying to find a real job for over a year, I've had a million interviews, and I've had no luck. Target or the YMCA seem to be my only options. I really don't get it.
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[22 Aug 2008|06:33pm]
I passed the MTEL! Unofficially. The internet results say I met the minimum requirement, but it doesn't tell me the exact score. Hopefully I'll get it in the mail so it will be official. But now I feel like I want a real teaching job and not one of the paraprofessional jobs I'm interviewing for. I'd rather make $30,000 a year than $18,000.

Other than that, working at Target sucks horribly. They have me closing every weekend. But, hopefully these test scores mean I can quit soon. This week I've been hanging out with Nate's friend Lori's daughter. It's been pretty fun. She's a good kid.
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[18 Jul 2008|10:19am]
I had an interview at the Green Bean in Northampton this morning. It was a working interview, similar to the one at cafe evolution, except I was there for about 20 minutes as opposed to 3 hours. I did what they asked me to do, cleared off and set tables, got milk, filled the half & half container. Everyone was really nice. She said she'd call me later today.

Considering I'm almost out of money, I really need a job. I just check my bank account and I have $24. So yeah, it's getting pretty desperate.

Tomorrow I have to wake up super early and go to Agawam for the MTEL. I'll be there pretty much all day. I guess I can take some pilot test and get money for future tests. I really hope I can pass. I feel pretty unprepared. I have no study skills. I just hope I have enough background knowledge to pull it off.
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the end of an era [07 Jul 2008|02:38pm]
My glasses broke this morning. I was trying to clean the lens on my shirt, and they snapped in half. I glued them back together with some super glue, but I can't wear broken glasses forever. I went to the eyewear place in downtown and they said it would take 7-10 business days. I didn't want to wait that long, and the guy there wasn't very friendly. They had cool frames, but they were all very expensive. So, I went to the glasses place in the Big Y plaza and they said it would take 3-4 days, which still isn't great but is better than 7-10. So I picked out a new pair, and hopefully they'll be ready by Wednesday. They're more modern, more rectangular. They're the same tortoise shell color, but they're green on the inside, which is cool. I've had the same vintage-cateye style of glasses since 10th grade, so it's going to be an adjustment. Welcome to the new millennium, I guess.
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[25 Jun 2008|12:31pm]
I had an interview at a preschool in Amherst yesterday. I might be able to sub there until their schoo year ends in July. The position I applied for doesn't start until August, which doesn't really help me and I'd like to be able to get a teaching job in the fall. I have an interview at NCYF in Springfield as a youth counselor, but I forgot to mention that I can't drive the van so I don't know if that's going to work out. I went to Cafe Evolution today and dropped off my resume, I have a paid working interview there next week. I'm gonna go basically work from 1-4 and see how it goes. I get paid for my time, which is good, but I'm not garunteed the job. So hopefully that goes well, even though that job is only part time. I really, really want to pass the MTEL and get my teaching license and be able to have a legitimate job in the fall. Even if I have to work in Springfield public schools and teach kids who are in gangs.

But yeah, right now I'm not working and I'm bored. I don't want to clean the apartment.
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last year, best year [20 Jun 2008|07:00pm]
Today was the last day of after school. My last day ever. It was a fun, hectic, unorganized day. We had some pizza (party pizzas are $12 at Big Y on Fridays!), decorated t-shirts, then half the kids got really into making up acts for the talent show while all the younger kids ran wild and asked me when we were going outside every 15 seconds. The talent show was not much of a show, it was thrown together at the last minute, but it was cute. Lots of hugs and nice words. It was a rought year at times, but for the most part it was really great and I'm always going to remember that group of kids. Yep.
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Northampton. [10 Jun 2008|09:53pm]
There are a couple English teacher opening in Northampton, which would be nice. I want to apply but I have to answer silly questions. The hardest one is this:

Choose a current topic or trend in education which is pertinent to the position for which you are applying and describe how it does/does not impact your teaching.

Because, honestly, I don't know very much about current topics or trends in education. And "my teaching"? What teaching? Entry level, hello? The fact that there's only one teacher at Bridge Street who appears to be under 30 makes me nervous. I feel like the attitude in Noho is "fuck young people." Maybe I'm wrong.

My other option is probably Springfield. Their application process doesn't involve as much thought. But I also don't want to get cursed at everyday by students.

Any topic or trend ideas? I seriously have no clue.
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I really just did that. [08 Jun 2008|07:59pm]
I just registered for the MTEL. Yep. I really did just register to take the MTEL for English (8-12). Yep, July 19th. I should have probably not done that on a whim. I'm probably going to be in the UMass library studying during all my free time for the next month. Because I really just registered to take that test in a month.

Because I have a new plan for my life that involves teaching for a year, then going to grad school in some really awesome city (Boston? NYC?) and then writing a lot and becoming famous for something. The next big children's writer? Maybe I'll write an awesome screenplay? Maybe a cool memoir? But the teaching to just to get me through the next year, since I've missed the deadlines to apply for grad school.

Shit, I can't believe I just registered for that test. Anyone who's been through this process, please help me?
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[26 May 2008|05:50pm]
This has been a great weekend! Here's the rundown:

Saturday- Went to Easthampton to let out the dog, TitoPepe (am now in love with him). Visited the animal shelter, sooo many adorable kittens. Went to Keene and Nate got his mom a really nice emerald necklace for her 50th birthday. Went out to eat with Nate's family, it was pretty good. Went back to eton to let the dog out again, serious play time.

Sunday- Went to let out the dog, long walk in the backyard, lots of fun. Went to Orange to go kyaking, more fun. Picked up Ashley in Pelham, campfire at John B.'s Pizza and good times.

Monday- Day off! Went to E. Brookfield to do some gardening at my dad's. Made $40. Went to N. Brookfield to see Jamie's kittens.... so frickin' cute!!! Now we're about to head over to Johnny's and Sarah's for some veggie kabobs.

I wish every weekend was a long weekend.
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[23 May 2008|11:42am]
I sent Hasbro my stuff on Wednesday. Caroline said this was a rushed hiring process and that her boss was already doing phone interviews. I've yet to hear anything. I don't understand why I haven't found a job yet. I've been applying all over the place, having interviews, doing what I think I'm supposed to be doing. I know I'm awesome. My friends, coworkers, and supervisors can attest to the fact that I'm awesome. So why the fuck can't I find a job? I really don't understand, and I'm starting to think I'm just unhireable.

I want to go to grad school, but it's too late to apply for this fall, so I'm going to have to apply for next fall ('09). I DON'T want another summer job that's going to end in September so I can crawl back to the Y where I promised myself I would never go back. I don't know what to do. Maybe I just don't know how to get a job because I've had the same stupid job for the past three years, mingled with meaningless last-minute summer jobs. I want to feel like the three years I spent at UMass weren't a waste. I want my degree to do more than hang on the wall in the living room.

I just saw a job I interviewed for months ago listed on craigslist. I was told they "could not offer me a position at this time" because of the volume of talent they had to sift through. If they had given me the job they wouldn't be reposting it!

It's really frustrating and discouraging. Too frustrating and discouraging.
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internship? [20 May 2008|01:07pm]
A friend of mine who works at Hasbro as a copywriter just informed me of a summer internship. I'm super excited and can't really wait to apply. I don't want to get too excited, because so far no jobs have worked out for me, but hopefully since it's an internship (paid) and I have a friend who works there it might improve my chances. This would be a great opportunity to get out of the world of childcare. I'd still have to find another part time job, since it's only 20 hours a week, but I could do that.. Oh, and I just got grad school info from Emerson that I requested. Maybe things will actually start happening?

I need to go clean the shitty bathroom.
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